Review: "Love, Theoretically" by Ali Hazelwood ★★★★

Review: Love, Theoretically by Ali Hazelwood

I am in my Ali Hazelwood era. This is essentially The Love Hypothesis 2.0 (technically 3.0 as I have yet to read Love on the Brain which came out before this), except with academic rivals/enemies to lovers STEM romance. Unfortunately, the female lead Elsie’s personality and conclusion-jumping had me cringing more than Olive’s rambling ever did. But this was fantastic!

“You could be my entire world,” he whispers in my ear before moving to my collarbone. “If you let me.”

PLOT SUMMARY
27-year-old Elsie Hannaway has a Ph.D. in theoretical physics and is an adjunct professor juggling various classes by day, and a fake-girlfriend to pay off her student loans by night. She is a people-pleaser and so tunes her personality to match a person’s needs. Her current client George Smith’s brother, 30-something-year-old Jack, seems to be able to see through her embellishments, but she cannot make him out at all other than that he seems arrogant – and shows up out of nowhere, a lot.

But she needn’t focus on all that now: she has a job offer at the prestige MIT and if she gets this she’ll be able to stop fake-dating and maybe even have time to work on her own research. Or so she thinks – because it turns out Jack is actually Jonathan Smith-Turner, an experimental physicist and the man whose prank article published 15 years ago has had experimentalists hating on theorists ever since (yikes) which consequently had her mentor Dr. Laurendeau, the editor at the time, fired (big yikes) AND happens to be part of the hiring committee for said job at MIT (BIGGEST YIKES!!!).

Elsie desires to exact revenge on behalf of her mentor and get the job of her dreams: two birds, one stone, it’s perfect (you might even say “Easy peasy, photons squeezy”, iykyk) – except, she does not expect to fall in love with Jack, and for him to bring out the best version of herself without even trying. But what happens when secrets about Jack’s life and his reasonings for publishing the article in the first place come to light?

This is told from the first-person past-tense POV of Elsie.

“It doesn’t matter if you hated me at first sight, because I’ve hated you long before we ever met. I hated you the first time I heard your name. I hated you when I was twelve and read what you’d done in the Scientific American. I’ve hated you harder, I’ve hated you longer. And I’ve hated you for better reasons.”

OVERALL OPINIONS
I am putting this down to: I loved the plot immensely but not all of its execution. The start of it was excellent, but then around the ¾s mark things slipped a little. I think I was hoping for more rivals to lovers moments, if I’m honest.

While Ali Hazelwood is the blueprint for STEM romance, and I am very happy that there is so much representation for women in science being a former one myself, it feels like she is churning out the same stuff. Even with the size of her men – very tall, very buff. I read Jack’s description here and I was like “this is literally Adam but with blonde hair”. Typecast, much?

Recently, Ali became a professor and I can tell that she is using her own experiences to write this. While, as I previously mentioned, I cannot speak for the issues of research in science, particularly monetary issues, I do not think that she should paint being a woman in STEM in a bad light. Indeed, if she does another book about this I will certainly throw a fit. While, sure, like anything academic it will be time-consuming but if you are passionate about it, it is worth it. And while it is good that she has raised awareness to the sexist issues being a woman in STEM, it is also good to show why women should apply for these courses/jobs. Give me a happy STEM woman – happy to be there, loves her job.

I really like that Jack’s prank is loosely based on an incident in 1996, the Sokal Hoax, when a New York University physics professor got a bogus article about quantum gravity published in an academic journal to test intellectual rigor and make a point about editorial carelessness.

Once again, my faith in men with names beginning with J is restored through fictional men. Thank you, Ali. I like the references to fandoms. She’s a real one for that one remark about Lord Of The Rings: “I used to know that light-haired guys weren’t attractive. Middle school? Everyone went after Legolas but I was an Aragorn girl” – saaame! I have to say, having Elsie a fan of Twilight is… a bold choice haha. Hedgizabeth Bennet for the hedgehog’s name made me chortle.

After reading a lot of dual POVs now, I forgot how much I also like the first-person narrative. It allows a lot of revelations to happen. From what I understand, again, all her books so far have been first-person female lead POV and it will be interesting to read her new book Not In Love which is her first book from a first-person dual POV. It already sounds like it might break the mould. Don’t get me wrong, Ali’s work is good. Essentially, I want her to try different things.

<< Positives >>
🠚Type 1 Diabetes representation. (And the way Jack wants to learn how to help her with it)
🠚I like the messages in the book that you should always be yourself and that you do not need someone else’s permission to do what you want.
🠚Learned a lot about theorists and experimentalists, and adjuncts and tenures.
🠚The amount of puns in here! I grinned like an idiot through most of them. I also loved the scene where Elsie discovers Jack is Jonathan, that was brilliant.
🠚The plot twists were good! I mean I should have realised about Jack being Jonathan but I forgot about that part of the blurb. And of course I knew there was something off about Dr. Laurendeau. but I never put it together until Jack said. So I liked that this wasn’t so predictable – and that you first think Jonathan Smith-Turner is the villain when in fact it’s Dr. Laurendeau. And I love that it is all linked to Jack and his late mother.
🠚I love the way Jack sees Elsie for who she really is, calls her bluff when she pretends things, and she doesn’t mould herself to become a “better version” for him. I like that they have various “honesty” moments where they are both honest with each other.
🠚Cece is so funny, quirky and iconic, I love her. From “Elsie, it’s the bare minimum. The bar’s so low, you could pick it up and beat him with it.” to writing her “MILF (manuscript I’d like to finish)”
🠚Greg being high was so funny, I like that Jack and Elsie exchange a “Isn’t coparenting fun” look.
🠚The adorable cameo of Olive and Adam was sweet, loved seeing them again. I like that Elsie and Olive become good friends by the end of the evening!

<< Negatives >>
🠚Minor: having the surname Smith again. I know it is theee most common surname ever but I just feel that characters in books should have different surnames. At first I wondered if he was related to Olive.
🠚The emails to Elsie from her students and their parents. I like the different formatting on the page, but I hate the things that her students say to her. There’s just no way I would ever be so undiplomatic with emails. I mean “ma’am it’s been 23 hours, have you graded my essay yet?” is the nicest, but even then it’s so rude. I skipped past a few of these, to be honest. I cringed too hard I thought my face would remain stuck with that expression for a while.
🠚I hate that Elsie hides her true self from Cece for several years. And all because she likes a guy she finally opens up?? Honey, no. If you can’t be yourself around someone you deem a best friend, there is literally no point.
🠚Jack’s article at the end of the book is something he should have done years ago. I feel him choosing to do that just to win her over is disappointing? Maybe that’s just me. I know there had to be a conflict somewhere, I just felt like it went by so quickly.
🠚The amount of times Elsie lies is too often.
🠚I would have preferred a better conclusion to Elsie’s relationship with her family: would like her brothers to stop being so stupid and be present for her. There is some hope from the phone call with Elsie’s mother, but yeah, it’s not as amicable as I’d like.
🠚The spice was reasonably good but I felt Elsie crying and laughing during Jack’s orgasm was not it. Ali don’t ruin moments like that please.
🠚Twilight and chill? Understandable but no thank you haha.

CHARACTERS
-ˋˏ ꒰ Elsie꒱ ˎˊ-
↳ I related so much to the people-pleasing side of Elsie. I did not relate to much else so there were times when I liked and disliked her. I understand her shifting her personality to vibe with another person because I have totally been there too. Or I have found out another person’s opinion on something and, not desiring conflict, agreed with them. Like Elsie, I am much better at this too, thanks to giving my opinion on books.
🠚What I appreciate the most is her character development, improving from her deceit/embellishing, agreeing with people to please them, to finally being herself and telling people exactly what she thinks. I especially loved the way she stands up for herself in front of Dr. Laurendeau.

It’s complicated, being a woman in STEM. Even more so when you’re young and unproven. And even more so when you have a semi-pathological need to get along with others

-ˋˏ ꒰ Jack꒱ ˎˊ-
↳ I love Jack’s openness, how he wants to ensure Elsie is comfortable, drive her around, etc. I really like him as a person, he deserves the world. I also like the description of his eyes being heterochromia (one is brown the other blue). He observes her, learns about her, like the scientist he is. Hoarding pants is… different though. Dunno about that one, my guy.
🠚He has his crossed-arms moment, his hand on the headrest when reversing the car moment. And a protective moment where he says “Leave her alone” to Astin. AND keeping the polaroid photo of Elsie and him when they tied at Go. He is very cute and sexy.
🠚I like that as the story progresses you get to see why he’s the way he is: he felt betrayed by his family not telling him Caroline was not his biological mother (which in turn is why he hates liars like Elsie), which turned into anger and resentment, and seeking vengeance on the one person who ruined his mother’s like, Dr. L., he published the nonsense hateful article. But it backfires and a lot of other people get hurt in the process.

FAV QUOTES
• I’m standing between him and the only entrance– either I overlooked him, or he bent the space-time continuum.
• he’s Jack Smith. He can do whatever he wants. He probably has a permit carved in those ridiculous biceps of his.
• There’s a dash of bad boy there. A hint of mystery, a dollop of smoothness. And yet a touch of hunger, a raw, unrefined air. Mostly, he looks cool. Too cool to even be cool.
• We theorists use math, construct models, explain the whys and hows of nature. We are thinkers. Experimentalists… well, they like to fuck around and find out. Build things and get their hands dirty. Like engineers. Or three-year-olds at the sandbox.
• Google’s main autofills for theoretical physics are: Not real science. Nonsense. Dead. (Slanderous. Google is slanderous and we should all switch to Bing.)
•The frown between his eyes deepens into a W–for What the everloving fuck?
• In the major picture of my life– a low-budget slapstick tragicomedy.
• there’s probably a physics equation that explains his annoying habit of becoming the center of mass of every room he burdens with his presence.
• He’s like a closed book. No, he’s like a book on fire. Fahrenheit 451–no words to read, just ashes and the abyss.
• Sweet summer STEMlord. I promise you’re not as edgy as you think.
• I’m laughing even more… “Are you going to be okay?” His voice is suddenly softer. More intimate. He’s really standing closer than we need to be. At least he’ll catch me if I fall again.
• “Not everyone wants you to be someone else, Elsie…It would be a waste.” “A waste of what?” “Of you.”
• “She’s beautiful, the girl. Really beautiful. There are lots of beautiful women in the world, and if you can believe it, it’s not something I usually notice, but I’m paying more attention to her than I otherwise would.”
• “I like to see you. When you’re trying not to be someone else.”
• His arms are wool and iron around me. Perfectly warm, perfectly solid. It’s several more moment of crying before I realise that he has pulled me against him. That this is a hug. His lips, dry and warm, press against my forehead as though he cares, as though all he wants is to comfort me.
• “This is not your character arc, Elsie. More like a…character bump.”
• I laugh, and Jack smiles just because of that, which is a little unlike him and also stupid. He’s stupid. I’m stupid. We’re stupid.
• “She’s not your girlfriend.” “She is if she wants to be. She can be my damn wife if she wants to be.”
• Honesty. I can be true to myself. People who care will stay, even when I’m not the Elsie they want.
• “What do you loathe?” | “The way you seem to always get under my skin.” | “Elsie.” His eyes close for a brief moment. When he opens them, stars are born. “You think you don’t live under mine?”
• “There is no universe in which I’m going to let you go.”